LOL

I've never used lol to say I'm laughing out loud.. Usually thats haha >> yes I really do "haha"

So now I saw LOL because I feel as though.. I've been such a fool ~_~

Naive.. And foolish to be thorough..

How?

Ever heard that little quip.. "Fool me once shame on you.. Fool me twice shame on me"

He fooled me twice.. I trusted him again and I took another hit.. Good God I have never been so stupid in my life..

I can't even say I'll learn from it because LOL i'm going to die soo n xD

He couldnt even spare a dying woman any sympathy.. Uhh I talked to this filth? Not saying I'm any better.. Bt I could have talked to better people for sure O.o

I wonder how many people he told the lie.. I wonder if it makes feel like a man.. Ruining a woman's life..

Oh lord.. I wish I could meet him now.. I Swear to god I'd shoot him in the head and think of consequences later

Daily post: Day 2 ~ Edmonton

Hayyyye Lahuuul :P Dusra din hogaya >:D<

Goooood morning bacha <3

Abhi toh bf nahi kiya hoga.. hai na?

actually :O abhi toh uthe bhi nahi hogeh :P

I think post ka time change karungi :S

Every day 6:30am yeh Daily walla post, post hoga okieee?

I wonder.. tumne brush kiya hoga par? :S

Ganda batcha :P nahi kiya hoga hehe pleeeeassse mereh liyeh karlena :S :P

Aur haan X.x Gonchu kaha tah na mujeh? Abse meh tumeh Gonchu Ji bolaungi >:P

hehe I think jab wapas aaungi toh mera Hindi fir seh bekar hojayega :S .. I mean acha toh khabie nahi tah :P but isseh bhu bura hoajyega :S fir seh sikana padega lahul :P

Tum pictures keh puchogeh hai na .. :( bt mujeh pics nahi leneh ab sniff pata hai my hair is so thin now :'( :'( :'(

awie.. ab toh missing your voice too much :( haha :P wish I could hear "cash dar gayi kya" ab :P

Tum na mujeh Chicken kehte ho par Chicken toh tum hi bante ho >:P bhai ki samne Vo nhi karsakte hahaha xP

Baaaaak Baaaaaak Baaaaakooook

xP xP xP

Wah :O kitna kuch lik diya :S

ab I'll put down the links to our laylist :"> aur haan kitni ushyar hu na :D meneh song name ko link bana diya ab you just have to press them B-) hehe :P

All the songs I post lahul make sure you read or listen to the words carefully because I mean every word <3

RC ~ Music Playlist 2

1. My same - Adele

2. Walking on Sunshine - Ally & AJ

3. I'll be there - Rembrandts

Daily post: Day 1 ~ Edmonton

Rahuuuuul !!

Well.. I'm going to be gone all week :( and I know you get lonely so.. I thought before I go I should Leave at least one post every day for you hehe aur jab jee chahe pad sakte ho :P

I know it's not the same as talking :( bt atleast itna toh karahi hu na? huh yaad hai jab tum Gujarat gaye teh aur net nhi tah -_- bohot miss kiya tah kamina tujeh X.x so shukar man lh keh itna bhi karahi hu >:P

abhi bhi sad ho :( toh samaj loh yeh Cheetos ka badla hai X.x :P hehe haan nhi karungi maaf  >:P

Desssssiiiii boy I'll be thinking about you.. I'll think.. Rahul kya karaha hoga?

Rahul kitne baje office jayega? >> haan puchna bhul gayi :S

Lahuuuuul kitne ladkiya ko ankh maraha hoga *eyes rolled* :P

Will miss your pagal jesi hasi :'( hehe :P and hayeee :"> avaz

pata hai? :O I downloaded all the Ishaqzaade songs :P hehe and because I was so excited doh baar mistake seh Afton ka parinde download hogaya :S oh well :P ab doh baar sunungi I guess :P

soch rhi hu.. keh abhi rahul rep deta toh uski smiley eseh hoti >> -P >> haha :P smile bhi eseh sharati hogi I bet xP xD

kya bak rhi hu pata nhi :S :P lahuuul tum toh bored hogaye hogeh :S oh well :D best friend hu na ;) haq hai mera bored karneka :P

aur haan :D ek bohot cute cow boy jesa ladka hai mera cousin ka dost.. meneh flirt kiya toh tuppar toh nhi marogeh na? :S :P

Also! Tum na mereh liyeh kitne RJ karte ho <3 aj soch rhi hu.. sab Daily post ki sath sath 3 songs pesh karungi tumhari liyeh hehe

These songs are specially dedicated to you rahul.. I hope keh tujeh pasand ayeh..umm lets get started >> haan tumhara line copy kiya xD :P

RC ~ Music Playlist 1

1. Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield

2. Umbrella - Rihanna ft Jay Z

3. Hold You Down - J. Lo ft. Fat Joe

Pitter Patter..

I'm an odd woman as they tell me..
I love the rain :D more than I love snow or hail or maybe even a clear sky..
I missed the rain all these winter days.. Don't get me wrong .. The snow was beautiful, graceful and stunning
But the rain is like a companion.. No matter how glittery and fancy anyone else is.. The person whos most beautiful to you is the person who is constant, who knows you at a level no one else does, who you would trust with your life, and if you were to go somewhere far away..You would miss them the most..  I can live without a snowy, or sunny day.. But I would cry if the rain left me to cope with every season alone
Maybe I Love the rain so much because I was born in vancouver? I spent alot of my childhood outside of the city but even where I stayed it rained alot..

My aged love for rain..

.



I was walking home from a long, tiresome day..
The wind was blowing and the grey sky brought out all the shadows in the faces of passers by.. You might not notice but I see in black and white.. An old habit from photography..So I noticed how their cheek bones would stand out against sunk eyes that stared into oblivion..thinking
My black umbrella concealed me from the harsher side of the rain which lashed at my cheek, creating delicate lines of red on my winter pale skin
I suddenly felt an overwhelming affection for this gorgeous music called rain.. It pitter pattered on my umbrella making me feel so at home and made me realize how much I missed the rain
I stepped over wet leaves.. Today was not a good day for heels.. I wished for the redrainboots I had in my youth but ofcourse I'd out grown them long ago
I was only a block away from my over the top house..
Damn I really hate that house O.o everything about it I hate.. The size making all the people passing by feel small, the brown colour half-heartedly trying to make it modest, the security camera trying to be intimidating.. If it were me I'd hit this house up just because the foolish owners think they can stop me with a single camera.. Then again many people call me a fool :P
I even hate the inside.. All the moldings painted in real gold just exuding greed, and gluttony
Huge foyer, huge banister, so many massive unused bedrooms..infact the entire first floor is empty
Yes I hate this house.. Yet I call it home.. I suppose simply because if I'm going to lie about having a home this is the most seemingly truthful lie

Anyway back to rain..

I realized.. I wasn't far from home so off go my expensive heels as I run through enormous puddles that soak my jeans till the knees and throw away my umbrella forgetting that I'm a medical student who should fear getting the cold .. That I'm a woman afraid of getting her hair frizzy .. That I'm a somebody afraid of what people might think.. I just know I love the rain and want it to completely encompass me.. Drench me and I want to feel the rush of cold as I leap into each puddle
I think about everyone who said they wanted to dance with me in the rain.. Every lover of mine without skipping a beat had asked me that.. So today I dance with no one because I have no lovers.. Maybe the girl with a black umbrella and heels does.. But me? No one knows this girl, this infatuated girl.. So can she have a lover?
Opening the gate I become heeled and umbrellad once more.. Laughing at what marie will say..and at that Rain loving girl..

Hmm.. Love..

Tanhayi.. The hindi word for lonliness..

Bechani.. The hindi word for restlesness..

Pareshani.. The hindi word for worriedness..

Never have I known these words with a kind of fire that has them all mixed..

I couldnt even have imagined to feel such a thing..you've loved truly once before but I? For once I feel like the freshman..new at this thing called True love.. Undying love..Pure love..

Everynight I toss and turn..making excuses about a mild pain in my back..mild to the beating thoughts that thrash a cowardly heart..that frisk the depths of a soul asking me..what is love? What must one do for love..?

For a feeling like this I couldnt have drempt..I couldnt have even imagined I couldnt have even wished..

Our love..what a great thing..

A Helpless Heart..

People sometimes ask me why I chose Medicine..

I could say something noble.. I could tell you I like to help sick people get better

Or that seeing that unearthly gratitude in a parents eyes when because of me their child's safe..

None of these answers would be a lie.. I do care about all these things.. they are my motivations

But it's not the first reason that comes to mind.. the first reason started with a boy along time ago who died and there wasn't anything I could do..

I felt so helpless.. Everyone was busy telling me it wasn't my fault.. Telling me there was nothing I could have done.. That I couldn't have known.. but is that honestly the truth? I couldn't have done anything? well maybe not.. I was in elementary.. maybe I was helpless.. but all I knew was I never wanted to feel like that again

So medicine it is .. it was until I got sick myself

I was scared but I knew there were cures and I had hope

I was young and knew death was possible but.. it didn't sink in I always thought..no..at that time I thought I knew I could get through, so I told the only man I trusted.. the only human being I trust completely ..
My Dad..

Sometimes My Daddy cries.. and I pretend not to notice but this time there was no denying why he covered his face with his hands..why his shoulders shook..why he made that odd sorrowful sound or why he for the first time ran away from..Me

Then I met the love of my life.. I'm not even really sure how it happened but I knew the second I saw him I needed find out who this man..really was and I found someone who I could be content with for the rest of my life.. he was a little cold at first..sometimes he pushed me away..but he was a Prince a King and as close to perfect that any being I met thus far had been

Now again.. I stand knees quaking.. every breath sharp and painful.. a dull pain in the back of my head matching the one in my lower back.. my heart aching.. mind aching.. and for the first time.. soul fading

For the first time I lose faith in myself and lose what he calls hope and I call pretending

And I broke up with him.. because I dn't think I'll be strong enough to say goodbye if hes there eyes pleading me not go.. I can't even look at him because I'm scared his eyes will make the truth sink in and make it impossible for me to leave..

I tell you so I can explain my mindset.. I've never feared death nor do I today.. maybe thats my problem

but anyway I was saying I explained what sort of thoughts are going through my head so that you understand
why I'm about to post this song..

"When your happy you enjoy the music..When your down you understand the lyrics"

Beyonce - Broken Hearted Girl

Another Lonely Day - Ben Harper

I've been with a king..